Afraid of Success
Afraid of Success: How to Stop Getting in Your Own Way to Success
It’s kind of obvious, success is something we all desire and strive for. It’s what keeps us up at night, wakes us up early in the morning and pushes us. The funny thing about success is that it’s very possible to want it and fear it at the same time. There are many reasons success is terrifying to many of us, but it’s a dangerous and potentially destructive feeling to carry around. If you want to take control of your life success has to be something you embrace whole-heartedly. You also have to overcome the fear because it will get in your way and add unnecessary obstacles to the path. Here are 3 positive affirmations you have to tell yourself if you find the idea of succeeding scary.
You Deserve it
Many people who fear success feel this way because they don’t believe they are worthy. Some compare themselves to others and for others the cause is a deeply ingrained inferiority complex. Whatever the cause, feeling that you don’t deserve happiness is incredibly dangerous. It leads to self-sabotage and other behaviors that can diminish your potential. You have to look deep down in yourself and find the reason for the complex so that you can work on solving it. There’s nothing different between you and people that succeed, so you have no reason to doubt what makes you worthy of success. If you’re hard working, dedicated, respectful and kind – you do deserve it!
It Can Change You for the Better
Does success scare you because you’re worried about how much it could change you? Maybe you’re worried that you’ll lose control of your life or that something bad will happen to you once you succeed. The good news is that it’s not the only possible outcome. Think about the inspirational people who are successful and have been changed for the better. Their improvement isn’t about their bank accounts but about the impact they’re able to make in the world. Remember that you have the power to choose how success changes you, for better or for worse. It is possible that your success will lead to fulfillment and a greater impact on others, without undoing any of the good in your life.
It is Possible
Nobody wants to feel like a failure when they work hard at something that ultimately fails, so we often fear success because we feel that it’s not possible. You look at what others have achieved and you conclude that there’s no way you can do something bigger. The irony is, telling yourself that success is impossible will make it more impossible. Instead you have to tell yourself that it’s possible for you. So what if no one else has done it, what if you’re the one that will? Remember that you should only define yourself by what you are capable of, not what other people aren’t.
There is no Success Ideal
What makes a lot of us struggle with success is the feeling that we’re not the kind of people who should get it. Our view of success can be that it’s meant for a specific type of person- attractive, rich, popular, or someone who studied something in a field that is “more prestigious”. When we feel we don’t fit into that, we start talking ourselves out of success and we become fearful of it – thinking “how long can it last if it wasn’t meant to be mine in the first place?” Of course we’re mistaken and of course we limit ourselves when we think that way and we stand in our own way. Anyone with the desire, mindset and work ethic to success can do so and many people who rose above bad circumstances are evidence of that.
Failure isn’t Permanent
One of the main reasons I struggled with success was panicking anytime something good happened because I would anticipate an inevitable fall. To try to avoid the blow of a fall, we can start dreaming less, wanting less and aiming for less so that the fall never happens. The truth: we will fail, make mistakes and stumble on the path. Success is not a straight line – it’s made up of a series of moves, events, decisions and lessons. It’s impossible to achieve success without experiencing some losses and failures. We shouldn’t fear that though, because each failure teaches us valuable lessons about the direction we’re going. We shouldn’t let the fear of the ebbs and flows of success hinder us from reaching as high as we can towards what we really want. It won’t be an easy path to get to the top of that mountain. The climb is tough, challenging and it won’t be smooth but when we let courage fuel us, we’ll achieve the satisfaction of making our wildest dreams a reality.
